Our talk of edge work reminded me of these words from Jesus, "Whoever seeks to keep his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life will preserve it" (Luke 17:33). I thought about how any move toward authentic new life involves a very real (and often very painful) kind of letting go, a death of what is, or of who we are now, to make room for the new life that is trying to emerge. The farther I go on this journey, the more deeply I realize that Abundant Life is not something you master; it's something you surrender yourself to. It's something you must die--that is, lay down your life, all that you are and all that you have--to possess. Only really, it possesses you.
As I wrote in Alone With God:
"Imagine a raging river full of white-water swirls and smooth dark boulders that cause the current to twist and churn. Now imagine yourself taking a running leap into the center of the current, plunging yourself into the torrent of rushing waters, and experiencing, as a result, the absolute loss of control over everything. In the beginning, that is how it feels to lose your life in Christ. It's a sort of "baptism unto death." But that is just the beginning.
Once caught in the flow, once the shock of the water enveloping you with such force begins to subside, you soon stop your struggle against the current, and, quite suddenly, you find that you are more alive than you have ever been. It is a wild life, even reckless, but the River flows with a purpose you can only faintly imagine, toward a goal that you cannot see. In joy, you give yourself to the River, and, at last, you rest...allowing this Power so much greater than yourself to take over the matter of your existence. And in that rest--the Sabbath Rest--you find yourself at peace, sustained and moved by the River to which you have given yourself, fully and without compromise." (Day 79)
May God grant us all the courage today, to jump.